I felt honored!

The first time I held Israel after his birth.

There moments in life when the inner power is made known.  My midwife Linda Johnson said, " I don't like the word empowering women because that would mean I have the power and I am giving it to this person."  What my midwife does is coach, she reminded me of my power. Making this experience more wonderful than any of my 3 births in a hospital setting.  Home-birth left me knowing, "If I can do this I can do anything.  I did this so I can do anything."  It was a healing experience.

I was 41 weeks. November 21st was the day of my ultrasound to make sure King Israel was doing fine.  The contractions slowed and on the phone my midwife gave me an indicator of when it's time.  She said, "When you are having a contraction and you think in your mind, I need my midwife that's when it's time."  She was right on.

At midnight my contractions transitioned.  The thought as I contracted was, "I need my midwife."  hehe.  I called my midwife and duola, got on my birthing ball, and just hoped it wouldn't be much longer before I saw my baby boy.  I learned my perfect labor epidural  was not drugs, it was singing worship songs to God.  Worship numbed the contractions as they came closer and closer together.

Three hours later I was holding King Issy Bear.  I look at the top picture of Israel and I in the birthing tub; I can feel everything again.  The pure joy I felt holding him.  When I held King Israel for the first time after pushing him from 8cm to birthing him within 20 minutes (I did not push for 20 minutes) it was an amazing moment.

Water birth was always one of my dreams.  I got in the water and it felt like I had left the physical room to a place with just my Israel, me and God.  This place was beautiful, like heaven was brought to earth for me to give birth to my son.

Chris Tomlin's Everlasting God blasted in the background, I heard the words "strength will rise as you wait upon the Lord..."  and I stayed in this great feeling place.  I rocked and moved with the water.   I knew it was time to see my baby.  I called my midwife telling her. "I am ready to see my baby," she replied, "Okay,  you know what to do." and left my side.  Those words still make me smile.

With God, my baby and I, we finished bringing him into the world.  As I held him in my arms for the first time I felt honored.  I said to him, "You came...I am so honored, you came."  Everday for the last 365 days I have felt honored, privileged and blessed he came into my life.

I love you, King Issy Bear!  Happy Birthday!